Kuti tikhaledi achimwemwe, tiyenera kupita ku Baibulo kaamba ka zitsogozo zofunika zimene zidzatithandiza. Zimenezi zimagwiranso ntchito kwa ife amene tili pabanja.
Ubale wosangalala komanso wokhutiritsa
N'zoonekeratu kuti kuyambira pachiyambi Mulungu ankafuna kuti ukwati ukhale ubwenzi wodalitsika, wokhutiritsa komanso wosangalala. Iye analenga munthu kukhala ngati Iyemwini (Genesis 1:27), kotero munthu anatha kukonda, kulankhulana ndi kulenga.
Koma ntchito yodabwitsa ya Mulungu ya chilengedwe sinali yokwanira kufikira Pamene Iye anapanga mkazi. "Pamenepo Yehova Mulungu anati, 'Si bwino kuti munthuyo akhale yekha. Ndidzapanga mthandizi amene ali woyenera kwa iye'." Genesis 2:18. Mthandizi, mnzake, wolingana naye, wina wogawana malingaliro ake akuya ndi kubwezera chikondi chake! Pamene Mulungu anatsogolera mkaziyo kwa Adamu, chimwemwe chake chinali chokwanira pamene anati: "Uyu tsopano ndi fupa la mafupa anga ndi mnofu wa mnofu wanga." Genesis 2:23.
Kenako m'vesi lotsatira limati: "N'chifukwa chake mwamuna amasiya bambo ake ndi mayi ake n'kugwirizana ndi mkazi wake, ndipo amakhala thupi limodzi." Genesis 2:24 (NIV). Yesu Mwini akubwereza vesi ili pa Mateyu 19:5, ndipo akuwonjezera kuti, "Choncho salinso awiri, koma thupi limodzi. Choncho zimene Mulungu wagwirizana pamodzi, munthu asasiyane. Mateyu 19:6. Mtumwi Paulo akunenanso za vesi lomwelo, pofotokoza kuti ukwati ndi chithunzi cha "chinsinsi chachikulu", chomwe ndi Khristu ndi mpingo. (Aefeso 5:32.)
Mankhwala a vuto lenileni
N'zoonekeratu kuti Mulungu amaona kuti ukwati ndi ubale wopatulika. Ndicho chimene Iye anatanthauza kuti ndi kuyambira pachiyambi. Kuyambira pachiyambi anapatsanso anthu malamulo amene analonjeza chimwemwe malinga ngati amvera malamulo ameneŵa. Koma n'zomvetsa chisoni kuti kusamvera kwina kunasintha zonse, ndipo uchimo unalowa m'chilengedwe chabwino cha Mulungu. Ngati tili oona mtima, tiyenera kuvomereza kuti ndi tchimobe limene limawononga maunansi, limayambitsa mavuto m'banja, ndipo limachititsa chikondi kuzizira.
Anthu ambiri amazindikira kuti timabadwa ngati zolengedwa zodzikonda, zomwe zimangoganiza za ife eni ndi chisangalalo chathu. Zimenezi sizitsogolera ku ukwati wachimwemwe! Koma Yesu akutipatsa yankho pa Luka 9:23: "Aliyense amene akufuna kukhala wophunzira wanga ayenera kudzikana okha ndi kutenga mtanda wawo tsiku ndi tsiku ndi kunditsatira."
Osati mitima iwiri yokha, komanso chifuniro chiwiri
Kuti timvetse bwino izi, tiyenera kumvetsetsa zomwe zimatanthauza "kudzikana tokha" ndi "kutenga mtanda wathu". Pankhani ya zinthu za padziko lapansi, nthawi zambiri sikovuta kwambiri kudzikana tokha, kapena kunena kuti Ayi kwa ife eni. Mwachitsanzo, ngati wina akufuna kukhala katswiri wa maseŵera, akhoza kudzimana chakudya choipa. Koma zimene Yesu akulankhula ndi chinthu chozama kwambiri kuposa ichi.
"Kudzikana tokha" kuli ndi zochita ndi chifuniro chathu—zokhumba zathu, zofuna ndi zofuna zomwe zimachokera ku chikhalidwe chathu chodzikonda monga anthu. Pafupifupi chifuniro chathu nthaŵi zonse chimatsutsana ndi chifuniro cha Mulungu. Pamene tili atsopano okwatirana, posachedwapa tidzazindikira kuti osati mitima iwiri yokha ndi miyoyo iwiri imabwera pamodzi, komanso maumunthu awiri osiyana, aliyense ali ndi chifuniro chake ndi chake!
Yesu analinso ndi chifuniro chaumunthu, koma Iye anati, "Osati chifuniro changa, koma Chanu chichitike." Luka 22:42. Yesu anasankha kukana chifuniro Chake, kukana chifuniro Chake, kotero kuti Iye ankachita chifuniro cha Mulungu. Mu Ahebri 10:9 Iye akuti, "Ndine pano, Mulungu, kuchita chifuniro chanu." Yesu anabwera kudzachita chifuniro cha Mulungu, ndipo zinatanthauza kuti Iye anayenera kusiya chifuniro Chake. Iye ndi chitsanzo chathu pa chilichonse, choncho ifenso tikhoza kukana chifuniro chathu ndi kuchita chifuniro cha Mulungu m'malo mwake. Tikakwatirana, zimenezi zidzachititsa kuti banja lathu likhale labwino kwambiri.
Yesu anafa pamtanda wakuthupi kuti alipire machimo athu. Koma pa moyo Wake, Iye anatenga mtanda Wake "wa tsiku ndi tsiku", ndipo izi zikutanthauza kuti Iye sanachitepo chifuniro Chake, Iye sanagonje konse ku tchimo mu chikhalidwe chake chaumunthu chimene Iye anayesedwa. Izi n'zimene Paulo akuzitcha "kufa kwa Ambuye Yesu" pa 2 Akorinto 4:10. Yesu akutipempha kuti timutsatire pa njira imeneyi pamene uchimo ungagonjetsedwe mu mphamvu ya Mzimu Woyera. Ngati titsatira Iye pa njira imeneyi, moyo Wake udzaonekeranso mwa ife ndipo ichi chidzakhala dalitso lalikulu kwa omwe akutizungulira, kuphatikizapo mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu!
Tingathandize bwanji miyoyo ya wina ndi mnzake!
Ndi uthenga wabwino kwambiri kuti Mulungu sanasinthe maganizo Ake pa nkhani ya ukwati, ngakhale kuti uchimo unabwera m'dziko kudzera mwa banja loyamba! Iye akufuna kuti zinthu zitiyendere bwino, ndipo m'chikondi Chake Iye watipatsa malamulo Ake omwe, ngati tiwasunga, adzatimasula ku dyera lathu laumunthu, kuti tiphunzire kukondana wina ndi mnzake monga momwe Iye amatikondera.
Chibadwa cha anthu chimakhumudwa mosavuta! Zimatengera zochepa kwambiri chifukwa cha kusamvetsetsana kwazazing'ono, chizolowezi chomwe sitimakonda, mawu osaganizira, kapena kuyang'ana kosuliza kuti tiwononge maubwenzi athu.
Koma mwamwayi tili ndi Mawu a Mulungu ndi malamulo otithandiza. Ngati titsatira, mwachitsanzo, mawu a pa Akolose 3:12-14, tili ndi chiyembekezo chabwino cha unansi wachimwemwe ndi wokhutiritsa monga momwe Mulungu anafunira kuti ukhale: "Inu ndinu anthu a Mulungu; iye anakukondani ndipo anakusankhani chifukwa cha zake. Chotero, muyenera kuvala chifundo, kukoma mtima, kudzichepetsa, kufatsa, ndi kuleza mtima. Khalani wololera wina ndi mnzake ndi kukhululukirana wina ndi mnzake nthaŵi iliyonse pamene aliyense wa inu ali ndi dandaulo pa wina. Muyenera kukhululukirana monga momwe Ambuye wakukhululukirani. Ndipo pa mikhalidwe yonseyi onjezerani chikondi, chimene chimagwirizanitsa zinthu zonse pamodzi mogwirizana mwangwiro."
Izi sizikutanthauza kuti nthawi zonse tidzavomereza kapena kukhala ndi lingaliro lofanana pa chilichonse. Mulungu watilenga ife monga munthu aliyense payekha ndi maumunthu osiyanasiyana ndi njira za kulingalira. Koma tingalimbikitsane modzichepetsa, mokoma mtima, ndi mwachifundo. Mwanjira imeneyi tingalemeretse miyoyo ya wina ndi mnzake ndi kukhala chithandizo chenicheni kwa wina ndi mnzake, monga momwe Mulungu anafunira kuti tikhale.
Ubale wa chidaliro ndi kukhulupirika
Baibulo limanena kuti ukwati ndi wolemekezeka m'njira iliyonse. (Ahebri 13:4.) Iye amatanthauza kuti kukhala ubale wolemekezeka kwa onse awiri. Sipayenera kukhala kuponderezedwa, kaya kwa mwamuna kapena mkazi, mosasamala kanthu za chikhalidwe kapena chiyambi chimene timachokera.
Pa Miyambo 18:22 timawerenga kuti, "Wopeza mkazi apeza chinthu chabwino." Mulungu anadalitsa ubale wa ukwati kuyambira pachiyambi (Genesis 1:27-28), ndipo Iye mwachionekere ankafuna kuti ukhale ubale umene mwamuna ndi mkazi amakhulupirirana ndipo ali okhulupirika kwa wina ndi mnzake. Monga mabwenzi pa njira ya moyo, mwamuna ndi mkazi akhoza kugwira ntchito limodzi monga gulu, ndi kuphunzira kukondana kwambiri, kotero iwo akhoza kukula pamodzi mu zonse zabwino. Ngati zimenezi n'zimene takumana nazo, ndiye kuti tinganene zoona kuti tili ndi banja losangalala.
Ndipo ngati sitinafike pamenepo, tilibe chifukwa chosiya chiyembekezo. Tingakhale ndi chidaliro chonse mwa Mulungu kuti tingafike kumeneko, ngati titsatira malamulo ndi malamulo Ake abwino.